I'm re-visiting the book Friends and Lovers by Joel Beeke. I really like this little book. Beeke talks about nourishing the friendship with our spouses. This passage I've quoted below could be equally applied to other friendships as well, and even our adult children. One thing I have noticed since my two older children basically live away from home is that I need to cultivate my friendship them, too.
Friendship cannot be warmed up by thirty seconds in the microwave. So much today is instant, but friendship is not. It costs something. It costs you yourself, your commitment, and your vulnerability. There are no rush orders in friendship. It must be baked slowly, gently, and continually if we want the flavor we are looking for.
I often worry about young people who spend too much time with social media. It's possible for them to follow the minute details of every celebrity they want to lavish their attention on, to the point where they really think there is a friendship there. Friendship is two-way; both parties need to feed into it. I have quite a few internet friends; women who have become very dear to me, and whom I may never meet face to face, but there is a two-way thing going on there. Friendships are indeed not instant, and the one we have with our husband should get just as much attention as the ones we have with others.